if you've ever wondered what it would be like to have the fire department break down your door, tear all your window screens out and ransack your room, just drop me a line- i'd be happy to fill you in. i'm just thankful captain amburgy and his blue-collar minions kept their filthy fireproof gloves off any and all prada on the premises. although it should be noted that my stack of back issues of 'dude' and 'inches' did appear somewhat disordered. i mean, if they'd just telephoned first!
and if you were curious about how one might go about getting so lost on the way back from detroit that one ends up in toledo, i might have a little insight on that for you as well.
so i've been seeing this guy, and i think its safe to say that we're pretty into each other. reader, can you keep a secret? i think this could be the real thing! i have had to temporarily move robbie williams and hugh jackman into the periphery of my heart in order to make way for the real deal. and no, this isnt like the time i fell in love with Calontir, that strapping boatswain who's ferry crosses the Drachenwald thrice daily. no, its true-- after a heart-stopping chance encounter at the Aut Bar, i have fallen madly, madly in love with npr personality todd mundt. when i say that we have been 'seeing each other,' what i mean is that i have been staring into the beautiful (albeit pixelated) eyes of the three gifs images.google.com has to offer me. really, personality is too limiting a term to apply to ann arbor's favorite hometown boy made good. mundt may have grown up in iowa but he will forever be a part of the little tree-lined community we call home.
no, but seriously. he totally breezed by me after taking a leak in the men's room and i thought i was going to pass out. i almost threw a drink in my own face. i think my water broke or something.
summary of the emails i've been getting from makeoutclub users:
hey, those bands you said you liked are really cool, wish i lived closer to michigan, etc. work sucks. lets be email buddies, okay? oh by the way, i'm 120 years old and REALLY, REALLY FUCKING UGLY. talk to you later dood! :) :) :)
i'm going to see soviet in detroit tomorrow. so eat your heart out, 'one other person in the midwest who knows who soviet is.'
for those of you who thought i'd taken a break from writing to compose some sort of uber-entry, i guess the joke's on you, huh?