the next time some one tries to pick me up- wait, scratch that- the first time someone tries to pick me up, i am going to cut their pitiful pickup line short by saying the following:
'excuse me, excuse me. maybe you didn't notice (make stabbing gestures all around me, in all directions) but i have a career, okay? and i'm not going to compromise that career to waste my time playing house with you!"
today in my spanish class, as my classmates completed their exams, my teacher took advantage of their lowered eyes to deftly slip me a sheet of paper. at the end of class i checked it out, and... yeah.
'TUTORING AND SUPPORT NOW AVAILABLE FOR THE LEARNING DISABLED! are you learning disabled or do suspect you might have a learning disability? if you answered 'yes' to these questions or someone else answered 'yes' for you becuse you lack the capacity for speech, come on down to room C134 for coffee, donuts, and to receive your very own pair of blunt scissors and your short-bus seating assignment.'
also, i can't stop thinking how funny it would be to wake up one of my roommates (particularly rod by sneaking into his room, leaning over his bed and launching into my best justin timberlake banshee falsetto as i shriek, "I JUST WANNA LOVE YOU BAY_BAYYYY! YE-AH YEAAAH YEAH!!"
also i think i smell like pee right now. actually i'm pretty sure i smell like pee, at least a little. i know that i do traditionally give my coworkers a hard time but at least no one has said anything. god bless the holiday spirit.